Today is tough.....

and i have no idea why. I slept pretty good, but I wake really feeling miserable - missing all those that left this earth before me. I am thinking about my dad, mom, brother, my grandson. Today's date has no relevance to anyone so why am I feeling this way? It's almost like I feel - okay whose next? I even sit here making myself envision just one thought that brought a smile to my face with each of these love ones in my past - but for some odd reason all I am seeing is the funeral and their body in the open casket. What's wrong with me - why am I thinking like this.

My beautiful grandson - August 26, 2007 - December 27, 2008
(16 months) Earned angel wings due to Krabbes Disease

My mom - July 8, 1938 - August 3, 2008
(70 years old) Earned angel wings due to cancer

My brother - October 28, 1958 - November 6, 2006
(48 years old) Earned angel wings due to massive heart attack

My dad - July 9, 1933 - April 25, 1988
(54 years old) Earned angel wings due to complications from open heart surgery

I don't have a pic of my dad on the computer or I would add him also.

I have so much to get done today and I just feel blah. I know it's okay to be missing all but why today. I want to so much crawl back into bed, throw the covers over my head, and fall into a deep sleep and when I wake my mind will be thinking differently. But I can't -- boys need pet supplies, I need food, I have about 4 loads of wash to do, cleaning, a bike to fix (and hopefully D will ride it today and not feel dorky in his helmet), I have a PSP to fix as M got a new memory card and wants everything transferred from his old memory card onto his new one, I have a web page to update for a client. I guess I better get a move on. I just wish I felt better.