Why.. How .. I know!

Why haven't I posted in a while..
Why does some days seem like it can't get much worse..
Why was I the chosen one..
Why do we have love ones taken from us..
Why does death even have to exist..
Why do some days I just want to throw my hands up in the air..
Why do I wake up some mornings and wonder what will the day bring..
Why do I smile and let everyone think I am okay..
Why does life have to be so hard somedays..
Why does everyone ask "I don't know how you do it alone"...

How do I tell my daughter that it will be okay someday..
How do I tell myself that it will be okay someday..
How come I am hurting so bad inside that I fear each day another love one will be taken..
How do I know that the choices I am making for my kids are the right one..
How do I make the best of each day..
How come I am even asking all this... I KNOW

I know the last few weeks have been very busy which is why I haven't posted..
I know some days are pure hell, but someone always has it worst..
I know I was chosen because I have faith..
I know we have love ones taken from us because angels are always needed to guide us..
I know death exist because everything has a beginning and an ending (it just might not be to our liking)..
I know I throw my hands up in the air because I am really asking the Lord to give me more patience which He does..
I know I smile and let everyone know all is okay because really deep inside me it is..
I know life is hard sometimes because it would be boring if it wasn't..
I know people ask because they are amazed at my abilities to do it alone..
I know my daughter and myself and everyone else that has lost a love one will be reunited one day and our love ones have opened our hearts to know what true love is and we get to live each day remembering this and passing it on to others..
I know I am hurting so bad inside because if I wasn't that means I never loved..
I know my choices for my kids are coming from my intuition and love that I have for each and everyone one of them..
I know I make each day the best I can because tomorrow might never come..
I know I am asking all this because I am human..